Hello Dear Brothers and Sisters of the Coast , i will shatter immediatly thy yearning to read that Rare may had imported a new Gem. They didn't and the Gem i'm referring towards is from a whole different Class...
To make even more sure that the Regulars nor the New Pirates would waste more time : This is not about game info, tips and tricks , no complaints , no opinion piece , no wisdom no lesson...
This is just a story, from an old guy that loves Sea of Thieves and the Pirates he often meet out there. If there is still one interested , probably ( * a poor) a New Pirate i will tell you this. i can't write yer Beautiful Language , i can't spell , have long forgotten what grammar means and i once again warn you that proceeding your read may ( * and probably will) leave you behind with a dissapointed feel in the region of " wasted lifetime"...
It has been a very long time before i'm daring to write a story again in my style ( * Which means no style at all, George , you tripple Moron)...i haven't feeling very happy with certain things but i have spewed that all out off my system a few weeks ago...i'm also became rusty and therefor tried to make a story of my own , set in the SOT world...i have postponed that since i'm simply stuck...
But Blood Crawls where it can't run and so i wanted to write a story again...
The New Updates , and i mean Arena and Tall Tales had made it impossible to write a story. The First reason is simple: Tall Tales are Sacred for me . That is Storytelling , and Storycreating in a way i never could , not even if i would take writing courses ( * Writing courses??? Whahahaaaa, you don't even know what alfabet means, GutterWriter - Oh, no have you remembered that old name, Sunshine? * Old name?, maybe Captain Tearface , but he still can't write even if his misarable life would depend on it...)
No , The Respect for the Tall Tale team, from Creator ,Music Composer , Graphics and Riddle Creators towards the Voiceactors who gave it their best, forbids me to write a single word as my words would only degrade their Great Stories of Lore...
" Oh, George " i hear you say ( * You whot ey??? You hear voices ...of readers ??? But you dumb yokel , the poor Soul that was reading has fallen in a coma ...You are a serialkiller with yer stories , a neckshot would be yer punishment if i was a judge...- They would call you Judge Mental, Sunshine * A ha haaa , funny joke , Captain Tearface , did you pay money to someone ,because you're not funny - Neither are you ,Sunshine...* Shut up) "can't you make us an Arena story ?".
No, i'm sorry , i only write from what i experience and feel and allthough i can see my crew and sometimes what they do , even in combat i miss details as i'm repairing and defending the ship...
Knowing what 16 other , and unknown Pirates are doing is just impossible and would be totally incomplete...
It would be Great if all 20 Pirates would write about the same battle but that's impossible to organize , unfortunately because that would really be a new style of writing...Imagine 20 Pirates equipped with their unique character that would write the battle as they saw and experienced through their eyes and mind...
But Rare wouldn't be Rare if they wouldn't think of Old George and so came Dark Relics , an Update in the Adventure part of Sea of Thieves who simply put, give you new maps to find New Trinkets that have a lot of value...And there my story starts ( * ZZZZ zzz zz , huh? Whot ? Is he finally starting ? And Jezus wept ...ah well, i got nothing else to do in this wasteland of an empty head of his).
i had late shift , came home tired , ate a bit while watching some boring television ( * Is there anything else than boring television programs? No ? i thought so). A bit later as usual i climbed my Atticstairs , a white door seals off the normal , boring ,dull , routinous life from ... George 's FantasyLand...i switched the light on and met with my trusted books , comics, games , movies , and musiccd's all ordered ( * You call that ordered?) in a ,well, choatic manner...
A Magical Device , i once bought from a certain Mr Spencer , was started . An eyehurting bright green made place for a Wellknown and Wellloved other Logo...Sea of Thieves Anniversary Edition...
My usual crew were already full so i just went on a Solo Sloop , with the option that Friends could join. After a very demanding week of Late shifts , i yearned to hear the waves clutch and splatter againts the bow of my lovely little vessel...
i never " dress up" myself nor my Sloop. i rather run around in Bilge Rat and other lowranked clothes than fancy Admiral or Legend Clothes. i see the way i keep things poor and simple an easier way to meet the "newer " Pirates who sail around in the same " dress up".
This has given me the oppertunity to drop a few tip and tricks to New Pirates or Newer Crews . Legends still bring fear to many New Pirates as many Legends still fire first nomatter what the quality of sailing and defending is deployed before their eyes...
i wasn't sure what to do, as i was tired i was simply very glad with sailing. No mission, no goal ...A way of sailing i like very much when feeling depleted...But the flares of smoke unleased by those threacherous but very interresting Reaper Chest brought me a glimpse of dubloon Fever.
i made sail towards the shipwreck . When i'm sailing alone , i even have eyes in the back . You have to , when you're alone , but i didn't see one Piratevessel , a Skeletonship here and one very further away but no Real Pirates...
So , calmed , and enjoying the subtle game music while the sounds of the wind almost felt like it was rousing through my ponytailed hair, i finally arrived the Shipwreck that had promised me it had a Reaper's Chest amongst it's cargo. The cargo was rich , so rich that i was doubting to not just take it all. Yes , yes , i too can become enslaved by the greed caused by Goldfever ( * Goldfever ...he's the man with the gun....ooops wrong song). i didn't knew what to do first , secure the Reaper's chest first or...take the other stuff first , so i went for the second option and off i went . In total i took 2 Emerald Gems , a Shipwrecked Captain's Chest , a Villianous Skull ( * That shining made you wobly , wasn't it ? moron...Do you not call these skulls Villainnousious skulls? LanguageMangler!) and a whole lot of baked fish and meat ...This is what i call a Prizeship...
Everytime i placed something on my humble Sloop, i looked around to see if not other Pirates were going after my prize, but i didn't saw anything...
But when i finally came to the surface with the Reaper's Chest, out of breath and already choking, i got startled by cannonfire. The flank of my Sloop took my sight away so i didn't knew what was having a go at me , was it a Skeletonship i had missed or was i being sneaked up by a Real Pirate?
The answer was handed to me from the moment i climbed my ladder , it was a Sloop with a Legend Sail , i could feel the raincloud already shoving over my mood . Quickly i dropped my Reaper's Chest ,jumped aside because a cannonball aimed at my face ( * Face? That thing is called Ugly Mug in English ,moron and why are you afraid ,fool? Even cannonballs take a turn when they see you upclose. You should have been a passenger on the Titanic , and they could bind you on their bow, you could break ice just by looking at it , mongrel, hihihihihihiiiiii). i got partly hit and was flung onto my middeck, quickly i ran back up the ladder dropped the sails , without aiming them...
i had spotted their first ,strange , mistake ...They had anchored with their sails down, while they started to pepper my poor old Sloop, but this thing isn't called " The Unsinkable LXII" not for nothing, so i quickly started to repair four holes that were taken.
In the meantime , my " enemy" had raised their anchor and started a chase , because of their anchoring of the ship ,they had lost a lot of...sea ( * It's not sea, moron , it's : they lost a lot of ground). But my sail was aimed wrongly , and while i repaired under fire from Eye of Reach fire , i finally succeeded in repairing the ship.
Back to the steering wheel , i saw they had already gained alot since my headstart. i turned the sail , took a bullet that nearly killed me and yet again i had to dive in my bananabarrel to find some revitalising fruit...
It started to rain cannonballs but many missed , being a bit a naturelover i became angry so i shouted ; " yow , yokels , are you the ones responsible for the hole in the ozonlayer? i'm here ,can't you see me". My mocking taunting behaviour has result , a cursed cannonball raised my sails , i turned but knew i was a sitting duck ( * Damn, i would like to alter "sitting" into a different word but the censorating machine forbids me again...AAArgh , another good joke sunk in the Sea - Pfft, Sunshine , do you call that a good joke? * Can you do better , crybaby?..- Sigh...* i thought so).
But once again these Pirates amazed me , they shot over me in speed because they had forgotten to raise sails or drop the anchor. From the moment i could use my sails again , i sailed away...But it would only be postponement .Two against One , they were close , i couldn't look since i was repeatedly shot by the Eye of Reach. A harpoon thudded in my middle deck , i turned agressivly but knew i couldn't hold the pace of bullets , harpoons , and trying to outturn them.
i looked to the sky but the God of the Heaven didn't granted me one sight ( * Can you blame him? moron...) So , in despair i gazed upon the Sea...Damn, i was so close , where did these Pirates came from? i had checked the Horizon before taking a new dive . They must have spawned at Sanctuary Outpost ,since that Outpost was close to the wreckage , or they had used islands and rocks as cover to sneak upon me.
i was getting ready to be boarded , there was no use to change my Flintlock for a Blunderbuss , even a three year old takes me out in a melee fight...But Sea of Thieves has always cared for me, and yet again the Sea Gods send help to an Old Desperate Pirate.
A Message popped up that PollyOliverPerk had joined the crew. PollyOliverPerk is a Forummember with a long career here.
We had chatted before and we had a common thing in games...We are a bit shy and on our guard in Mulitplayer Games...And i had told her that if she saw an open spot , she was always welcome...
i call her she , but i didn't knew that, for me Polly was the Parrot from " Polly wants a ...,damn censoratingmachine, why don't you take a hike?..., cookie. Oliver is a man's name , so i thought he was a man and Perk , well i know the word from the Fallout games where Perks are things or abilities you gain by levelling up...
To my amazement Polly was a she . Quickly i welcomed her and asked to aim the sails ,as i was trying to outturn them to break their harpoonline. Hope and Courage has arrived in the shape of a New Sidekick and Kicking , oh yeah , she did...
We outturned them and the pesky Eye of Reach shots that sometimes took more than half of my health while i was holding the Helm ,became answered by Eye of reach Fire from Mrs Polly...The odds were even...The " sightseeing tour " could start with full Passion...
i was so uplifted that there was at least a chance that we could bank the Reaper's Chest in, that i started to taunt again...Funny taunts , childish stereotypical moviequotes were flying out of my mouth like bullets from a machinegun...It was so harmless fun that even Mrs Polly laughed...
We talked while we were taking them to the " Old George's Sightseeing tour over the Wonderful , Fantastic World of SOT".
i could immediatly hear that the SeaGods had send me , once again , a Person with a Heart of Gold...Poor Neil Young , he's searching for a Heart of Gold for his whole life and i just have to gaze to the Sea Gods and they provide me with one...
i may be a real loser in real life ,for many of your eyes ,but when i play SOT , i really meet alot of exeptional personalities...
While we were getting to know eachother a bit better , the " enemy " had closed in again.And the Harpoon struck our Sloop again.
Mrs Polly fired a shot again and after that another one.Then she sheered : " Wow, George , i shot him...it's the first time i killed a Pirate with my Eye of Reach on a wild Sea that bobs the ship up and down"...
We laughed and celebrated this victory. " The enemy" was not so impressed and persued us still. Many minutes passed and the cat and mouse game pursued . They were following on a distance that was too small to be able to do a " flyby" , jumping loaded with cargo of the ship ,would make them able to catch us and shoot us...
Yep , you guessed it right , we were in for a very long game in which we had to sail untill they broke the pursuit out of boredom...Something i can do by myself but was it fair towards Mrs Polly? Uhm...no...
But then my destiny started to play with me . i haven't stolen nor invented my own gamertag , the Clumsy part is given by my dear collegeus after i had several desastrous years of all kinds of injuries at work...Don't worry ,all my accidents together ,had accumulated one sickday because of a concussion , the rest of the injuries i just putted the teeth upon eachother and kept pummeling forward ...
But it's not an empty name...i " bumped" into a Rock , a Balboa one , one that simply doesn't go down , but always stands in the way on the wrong time...
Luckely we ricochetted of the rock but lost considerable speed. Mrs Polly started to repair but i saw them coming, this time i had messed it up and i felt i had to at least try to give her a chance...
We had been sailing for more than half an hour, and we never did one attempt to board them.i was hoping that this ,together with the fact that we have a uncostimzed ship , no Legend clothes , would rock them to sleep and think we were fairly New Pirates...
i jumped in the Sea and to my suprize rose up to the surface when the ladder passed me by ...For once i didn't missed it. i climbed up , amazed they didn't heard me swimming ,i dropped their anchorage...The Pirate on the Helm didn't even moved ...Huh? Was he deaf? i didn't care , in true Clint Eastwood style ( * He would never shoot in the back, don't slander the Man, moron) i shot him in the back...The two following swordslashes made him dissappear in a green smoke. Then his sidekick realized something was wrong and he came up running...i was lucky again, i placed a pistol shot , started to fight with the sword with him and killed him ,while i had enough health in my carcass that would dissappear if someone would spit in my eye...
Mrs Polly's ship was gaining distance ...i crawled on the canopy, for guarding the Capstan ...It was my last stand ...i fought courageously ( * Whahahaaaa, these Pirates were so fast you didn't hit them once , Gutterwriter)...
The Good FerryCaptain was pleased to meet me again and allthough he ordered me to clean and swab his deck , a fortunate fact that The Broom is still not imported in the game , made that i could return quickly to the World of Sot...
We cheered because they were nowhere to be seen ....And since they were a Sloop who has the same topspeed as us , they would have lost courage and would leave us alone...
All we needed to do was cash in but a Megalodonodon and later a brigantina made us alter our course several times...
Finally we cashed our stuff in...We made it and we jumped on a new ship for a New Adventure under the Protecting Wing of my Captain, Mr J4dio...
So , once again , i have met a Wonderful Personality of the Sea...We , both , are not really Multiplayer Gamers as speaking,and becoming trolled for whatver reason has us made withdraw our voice from these kinds of Games ...But SOT is so much different than those Games...Is the Life Like and Realistic Sea responsible that many People play in a more Friendly way ? Or is the slow pace of sailing that brings some sanity back to a Multiplayer division that normally is flooded with verbally hurting comments ?
i don't know what it is that roams in this game. But nomatter what i call it ,from Magic to Anomaly, meeting Great People has inspired me to pick up my toecurling stories again...
This Forum and this game is too beautiful to become destroyed and soured by negativists , complainers and trolls...i picked the glove up , have cleansed myself from negative thoughts and i will hopefully meet many more People that Influence this game in Positive way and give me Memories untill i reached my 111th Birthday...
Mrs .PollyOliverPerk , i thank ye for a wonderful evening ,and eventhough that Reaper's chest had only a value of a handfull of dubloons, the Adventure was priceless for me...
You , are an Unexpected Gem, always remember that , Ma'am!!
...And now....Off to many more sortalike Epic Adventures....YEEEEHAAAAA.
